it visited jordan first. not at the bottom of a bottle or the tip of his pen, but in the same breeze that made town as cold as it was when i left. i remember sitting on that wall with you watching storm clouds roll in from the coast at 3am. the rain came, and with it a nine letter word i still don’t completely understand. i miss you, and for now that’s enough for me.
tonight i sat here and worried about finding happiness again. my biggest fear is becoming someone who lets you down. then i realized that beyond all this doubt remains hope, and i fucking lost it.